la lng..

"Mud washes off much more easily than insults!"

It was just a usual day...No extraordinary happenings that moved me.Things turn out tedious and monotonous.I was not expecting things that way but at the end of the day I found myself dumbfounded because of that sort of nonsense recollection of thoughts out of the broken love story I have had in the latter years.Well, how I wished that I was just so numb to devoid myself from the left overs of that once thought fairy-tale-like- love story, where I was her heroic prince or maybe a knight and shining armor of her beautiful life. Then, she was my stunning, alluring, and fascinating princess that herself defines the real essence of beauty.Poor me for that exemplary illusion!...To make the story line brief and clear...Fasten your seatbelt...Hold your precious breath...Welcome to the world of incomparable martyrdome!!!...Tententenen...(CHAR LANG!)...
Actually, it sprouted during the activity in the self-awareness as part of the protocol for the exposure of the psychiatric ward in the psychiatric agency. As this query make a scene during that serene time and made revealed that past;" What is your happiest moment or experience?" Then, through out the ample time allocated for that whole activity I found myself so busy answering those inquiries presented to us except of that query that moved me. Basically because I was then surprised for that astounding question. I collected choices in my mind but how come that reply was the one prioritized than the other. "Well my happiest moment was when the time we spent together with my girlfriend before". And take note I added some lines that stimulated me to reminisce the past. "Thus, when she took an exit in my life I was with broken soul and spirit!..."Oh c'mon...This is a heck...", that was the initial reaction as I ponder after that disclosure.Next to that was the supposed to be casual exit of Davao Doctors College heading towards the boarding house but I was in the wrong mind set for I ended up thinking things in the past. It may sound "korny" to map out the days of my melodramatic life but I was then experiencing things like that. How I hate to bring back the past for no reason at all.Those damn things and occurences must be kept in the memory bank of my hypothamus and not be disclosed anymore in the public straight from the horse's mouth. But after which,great feeling came in for I was once frank to my groupmates which was the very aim of that activity. Honestly, I am so fragile whenever I would recall the broken relationship we have had. Maybe, because the separation rooted from a baloney which was from handful of jealosy. I may be right that time to accuse her to engage in a third party relationship but there was no more sincere talk after I tried to converse with her and then failed for she was so rude of not trying to face me to resolve the problem. After that attempt talk to her I made myself so sad and pre- occupied by the fact that she had betrayed a sincere me without trying to save the relationship.That day devastate me a lot!Until now I can feel the aches and lost well- established self- esteem inside me. That was one of the most offensive story that transpired in my whole wonderfurful existence. I was not humiliated that way!But still i kept my spirit intact and unruined!I had convinced myself to make up my mind that I need to understand her for I am mature enough thus, I made a way to bring back the relationship as if nothing happens.Later on, it was too late to make a move to make up the relationship for the damage has been than and the bruises are still fresh that time.
As of now I still long for that little lady that made my life complete for once and shattered my dreams because her and that would be fervent.I may sound bias but that was the real thing. I loved her more than anyone else but then still injured after all. I'm not that narsicistic to put all the blame to her for I lost my love for myself just because of her. Well, to end up this histrionic piece one lesson has been securely inculcated inside me, "Do not allow to give your all once you are feeling the odd stuff inside for in the end you will run out the reason to live and love again"...